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Eric Was Reconsidering His Decision To Eat All of His Business Cards at Once. |
OK – you’ve been sacked. It’s not the end of the world, you’ll get another job, eventually. But let’s not be glum or downhearted. You’ve now got a few weeks of much need leisure time and a couple of thousand now equally redundant business cards to amuse yourself with. Here’s a few ideas you might like to consider:
Clickers for your bike
This is always a favourite. Fix the business card to the frame of the bike with a clothes peg so the card runs along the spokes as the wheel spins. As you’re following the advice of the Conservative Party and getting on your bike to go and find work, let the world know you’re on your way! It was cool when you were eight, why not now.
Wobbly Leg Fixers
Got a wobbly leg on your furniture? No problem, a little stack of cards is ideal for levelling up the offending appendage.
Toothpick
Those sharp little corners are ideal for rooting out those pesky bits of bacon and sweet corn, and because the card is quite soft you won’t damage your gums in the attempt.
Fingernail Cleaner
Essential for interview prep, you want to look your best.
Nights OutDecoy
Root out your supply of the other peoples business cards you collected while working for the swines that let you go, especially your old bosses, and put them in your wallet. Then while you’re out drowning your sorrows and being a little too friendly with those ladies that wouldn’t be nearly as attractive if you were sober, and you’re making all sorts of promises you have no intention of keeping, simply hand one of the cards with the words “call me – can’t wait” and return home secure in the knowledge that a) you’re in the clear, b) your boss will be getting a call from a bunny boiler that will give him all the hassle he deserves.
So there you go – how to those recycled business cards can save the planet and help even the score at the same time.